Unfortunately, Jackson’s symptoms were getting much worse. Bad headaches super sensitivity to light and noise were just plaguing him. Quite often, he would just sit in the school room/study/guest room and look out the window and cry, watching his buddies play in the street. It was so tough for him and it was killing me to watch it.
Thankfully, Bear was still having a ball at Nanny and Paw Paw’s but unfortunately Lincoln was a fussy mess most of the time. He was also getting up 4+ times a night to nurse EVERY.SINGLE.NIGHT. So, clearly, we run and well rested and tight ship. . .haha.
Occasionally neighborhood kids came by and it absolutely made Jackson’s day.
On this particular day some twin friends of Jack’s, Luke and Chris, asked me to tell them Jackson’s favorite ice cream flavor. Then they rounded up all of the other kids on the street and the kids all put together ingredients to make Jackson homemade cookies and cream ice cream. It was seriously one of the best moments of my month. Seeing his face light up like this when his buddies proudly handed him this bowl was priceless. He felt so good knowing that his friends had put this together for him. It was a good Saturday for all of us.
Sweet neighborhood friends.
Baron loves puzzles. As you can see he was quite neglected at Nanny and Paw Paw’s house. He only has 4 puzzles and his beloved, Baron puppy, by his side. Seeing that Bear was carefree and having a ball also did my heart a lot of good!
Sweet Clara came over quite often to play with Jackson. Since he had to be calm and couldn’t go outside (the light really irritated his headaches) she was one of the only consistent friends who came to visit. It’s pretty hard for boys to volunteer to play calmly, especially inside the house. One afternoon Jack and Clara formed a band. Lincoln helped with vocals.
Lincoln was still barely eating solid food. He just wanted to nurse, all of the time.
Clara brought over a plethora of play dough.
And then they treated me to a concert.
They made a good looking band!
Clara reading her latest lyrics.
The band’s dress code was pretty lenient.
One morning after I’d been up with a crying Jackson for much of the night, he was taking a shower and wrote a message to me on the door. He asked me to write “You’re” and then he wrote, “the best mom in the whol world.” I love that little sweetie.
One morning Jackson wanted to play dress up with Lincoln. Lennon’s cute puppy costume still fit him.
On Monday, February 3rd we had a very busy day planned. Jackson had the first of his biweekly pediatrician appointments to check on his concussion and hopefully remove the reminder of his stitches. Jackson was super excited to hear that he would, in
fact get his stitches out.
Stitch free and looking pretty yucky.
The pediatrician also said that we needed to immediately see a pediatric dentist because Jackson was having a lot of pain in his mouth and jaw area. In addition to that he said that we needed to go see a team of brain surgeons for more severe concussion monitoring. Despite the fact that I knew we weren’t going for brain surgery, I was still pretty alarmed that we were going to see the brain docs. Hearing the pediatrician talk about all of the possible permanent brain damage that can occur from improperly treated concussions was pretty distressing. I had been thanking God constantly for His protection over Jackson and also asking Him to heal his brain quickly. My prayers were now doubled and I was praying Jeremiah 29:11 pretty continually as well.
After we got Jackson’s stitches out we went home to have lunch and the van died. . .again. We got the van towed, again, and left in a rental for the dentist to have Jackson’s teeth x-rayed to be sure that permanent damage was not sustained. As soon as we arrived at the dentist office Lincoln started throwing up. When I say throwing up I mean, violent, projectile vomit. It was insane. I pretty much roll with the punches but at this point I was feeling really stressed with all that was going on with Jackson and the car and now Lincoln. Obviously Jackson being by far my biggest concern. So, I used a LOT of paper towels from the dentist and cleaned Lincoln up as best I could and strapped him into my ergo carrier and went in for Jackson’s appointment. Turns out that he had 4 fractured teeth but thankfully they were all baby teeth so we didn’t have to do anything.
A bright point in my day was my sweet neighbor, Janie, bringing me a basket of extra veggies from her coop. It was such a blessing because going to the store was not going to happen with Lincoln being so sick.
And our sweet next door neighbors, Kate and Jake, brought Jackson these games to help entertain him during his concussion.
The next day we saw the brain docs at the concussion clinic and they immediately sent Jackson for a ct scan. Jay was able to work from home so that I could take Jackson during Lincoln’s nap time. Poor Lincoln was still super sick and throwing up quite a bit. Seeing Jackson and his faithful teddy bear, Sargent Adams, laying on that table I just thanked God for my healthy boys. Of course I also prayed fervently that he wouldn’t have any damage but I felt confident that he was ok.
When we got home our dear friends, the Schielein family, had brought Jackson this activity book and Addison had drawn him a picture. And, my wonderful friend, Jill Dobies, had texted me saying that she was bringing us dinner. I had refused dinners until this point. But with Lincoln being sick I didn’t resist this one. There was no way that I could get to the store.
Poor Lincoln’s sickness was getting much worse. He was throwing up and crying constantly. He also had horrific diarrhea. He typically woke up 4+ times a night to nurse but now he was waking up every hour sick. I was at the end of my rope with exhaustion. We were seeing the pediatrician twice a week in addition to the brain docs and our usual twice a week therapies for Lincoln. Our car was having serious issues and had been towed twice. Thank God that Baron was at the Osby’s. I can’t imagine retaining sanity if I’d had to juggle anything else during this time. Jay was helping when he could but was in the middle of a PCI audit (basically a PCI audit means he works a million hours and is wrought with stress).
One of my neighbors heard that Lincoln was also sick and brought me a present. Two bottles of wine! Bless her. Although that wine lasted me far longer than this ordeal, the fact that she thought of me brightened my day beyond belief.
Here’s Jackson putting together a lego kit that he had been given by some friends. I don’t remember who sent this one but looking at these pictures I feel so much gratitude for all of the family and friends who both prayed for us and thought of us sending precious things to make our little buddy smile.
These guys couldn’t wrestle any but they definitely got in lots of snuggle time after work.
Lincoln had an annual evaluation that I had scheduled 4 months in advance for his ECI (early childhood intervention) therapies. I had let his therapist know that he was sick but on the day of the evaluation he hadn't been sick any. The evaluator (not in the picture) was having a baby the next week and told us to come ahead to the meeting because otherwise we’d have to wait until she was done with her 12 week maternity leave. Lincoln had been to the pediatrician (I seriously felt like we should just have our mail sent to the doctor because we were there SO often) that morning and he’d said that there was a nasty virus going around and we’d probably seen the worst of it. So, thinking that he was over his virus we went ahead to the 3 hour evaluation.
Poor Lincoln was just not feeling it. The evaluation revealed that he had not only a language delay but also a processing delay. Hearing that was really distressing to me because it meant that something was really wrong and he might have special learning needs instead of just having a speech delay. While it certainly wouldn’t be the end of the world, I was just feeling very overwhelmed by that news. Thankfully, I didn’t tell anyone about the situation (not even Jay) because there was so much else going on that I, a) couldn’t process/deal with it right then and b) didn’t want anyone else to worry, especially Jay during his audit at work. I also prayed like crazy that the evaluation was wrong. And, praise the Lord (spoiler alert), it was wrong! After this “virus” ordeal and concussion stuff was totally over I had Lincoln re-evaluated and they found that he is actually way ahead in processing. So, he’s delayed in speech, but only by 3 months which is really not a big deal. But it was a huge relief to know that he was actually ahead in processing.
Jackson showing the progress of his scar.
Aunt Carolyn and family sent a super fun paper airplane kit that Jackson loved playing with for several days.
Lincoln still seemed to be feeling better after his evaluation. Jackson was super upset about not being able to play outside when all of his friends were in the street playing football. The poor, frustrated little guy just laid on the floor and cried. His head was hurting so badly and the brain doctor had said that because this injury had triggered migraines it might be a life long struggle for Jackson. So, once again, I prayed like crazy that it was not and that God would take the headaches away from Jackson immediately and that they would never return. All the while I had started having migraines. Seriously weird stuff.
Sweet littlest brother snuggling Jackson and trying to cheer him up.
Jackson was so sad that I called Jay and asked him to pick up ingredients for s’mores. Jay got home and he and Jackson built a fire and had some “man time” making s’mores. I was so very happy to see Jackson’s smile. Of course that win was quickly overshadowed by the fact that Lincoln became sick, again. His one day of feeling better ended very abruptly. He was as sick as I’ve ever seen one of my kids.
The next day (Thursday, February 6th) my mom came down for the weekend to visit and help with the boys. Jackson was very excited to see his Gaga and I was thrilled to have someone to entertain him while I dealt with Lincoln throwing up and having diarrhea every where, every hour. The night that Gaga arrived poor Lincoln was up sick more than 10 times. My poor tiny buddy was miserable.
Here we are at the brain surgeons concussion clinic. Every where we went I had to take extra clothes for Lincoln and I also covered him in towels in the car because every time we went anywhere he got sick. He also got sick if we didn’t go anywhere and I had to take Jackson to these appointments. We were definitely in survival mode. Lincoln would throw up into my shirt and there came a point where it really didn’t even phase me. I took Lincoln to the pediatrician and he said it was just a nasty virus. Thank God that Lincoln was nursing because I was able to get some nutrition and sustenance into his sweet little body.
Friday night Lincoln was even sicker than he’d been, which after the week we’d had was pretty hard to believe. I was rocking him and debating on taking him to the ER. He’d already been to the pediatrician that morning and I didn’t want to overreact and expose him to ER germs. With all that we were going through with Jackson I wasn’t sure if I was being crazy and overreacting to the virus or if he really needed to go in. And he was crying tears, so the internet said he wasn’t dehydrated. My mom was with me and said he’d be fine and not to take him in. Thankfully, Jay insisted (quite forcefully) that I take him to the local ER. Looking back I don’t think I was thinking straight at all. It had been 20 months since I’d slept 4 straight hours and at least a week since I’d slept 2 straight hours. I was pretty exhausted both emotionally and physically. Lincoln’s fever spiked as soon as we got to the ER and was 105.8. They took blood and urine and immediately put him on iv fluids. He was severely dehydrated and had dangerously low potassium.
My poor, sick little guy was so listless.
I had just texted Jay saying that Lincoln was on fluids and that I’d probably be home in a few hours when the doctor came back in and said that our precious guy was sicker than she had originally thought. She let me know what a security guard would get my car keys from me and bring in Lincoln’s car seat because he needed to immediately be transferred to Dell Children’s hospital via ambulance. I called Jay and he brought me a bag with my toothbrush and a few other items since I would clearly be spending the night in the hospital. It was so surreal seeing Lincoln being loaded into the ambulance. I was just thanking God that dehydration was fixable and that he would be ok. I was also so thankful for Jay following his intuition and insisting that I take Lincoln to the ER.
Lincoln hadn’t slept a straight hour in a week and finally fell asleep in the ambulance.
When we got to the hospital Lincoln was miserable and just cried the entire time. It was seriously gut wrenching to see Lincoln screaming each time a doctor or nurse came into the room. The poor little guy was poked and prodded so many times and having to hold him down while they took blood or repositioned the iv for the 50th time was heart breaking. I was so, so very tired that I was in tears picturing him thinking that I was holding him down for people to hurt him. Having a newborn (Baron) in the NICU was so much less stressful than this because Baron at least had no idea what was going on. Lincoln had enough understanding to be hysterical and screaming, “mama” while clawing at my chest and trying to get me to protect him, yet not enough to understand that everyone was trying to help him to feel better. It was really tough. He was so exhausted yet couldn’t sleep. I laid on the super uncomfortable pull out love seat with Lincoln on my chest for what seemed like a week. Lincoln would finally fall asleep after hours of whimpering and without fail at that moment one of the residents would come in and wake him up to ask me if they could examine him. Finally, I asked our head doctor to put a stop to that and she put a sign on the door that we were not to be interrupted while he was sleeping. I think we got about 2 actual hours of sleep that night divided over probably 6 segments of sleep.
Jackson was so excited to have Gaga in town and she helped him to clean his room. I got this picture of him proudly showing off his hard work, or more likely Gaga’s hard work while he chatted with her. Either way, it definitely put a smile on my face to see my sweet boy in a good mood. Unfortunately, Gaga promptly got sick with what she thought was Lincoln’s virus. It was super helpful to have her with us that weekend so that Jay could bring come visit Lincoln on Saturday without having to take Jackson to the hospital but I felt awful that Gaga was so sick.
Poor Lincoln was not much improved by day #2 at Dell Children’s. He was getting sick so often that I had gone through all 3 of the outfits Jay had packed for me. I finally resorted to wearing scrubs. That Saturday (February 8th) I went through 11 pairs of scrub pants due to Lincoln getting sick on me so many times.
When I had to lay him down (so that I could change or use the bathroom) he’d just cry and cry not even moving. So, 99% of the time I held him or laid down with him on my chest.
At one point he fell asleep for 27 minutes. I prayed that the 27 minutes would be more restorative to his little body than seemed possible.
Didn’t last long and he awoke just as miserable as he’d been when he went to sleep. Also his iv kept getting tangled up and the machine was beeping what seemed like every 5 minutes. They kept rolling the veins when they tried to take blood because he was so dehydrated. Thank God that I finally learned about the pic team who specialize in iv insertion and blood draws. At that point I wouldn’t let anyone that wasn’t on the team touch him. It made such a tremendous difference and I cried a lot less.
Saturday night was just as exhausting as Friday night had been. Lincoln barely slept any and was sick constantly. A few friends from our Sunday school class had offered meals when Jackson was injured and I had thanked them and declined. At this point, I waved my white flag and emailed saying that I would greatly appreciate the blessing of meals because I was at the end of my rope and had no idea when I’d even be able to take Lincoln in public again. On Sunday Lincoln’s levels were a little better and he was so swollen from fluids that he didn’t even look like the same baby.
On Sunday Lincoln drank some juice. It was his first time to drink anything other than water or breast milk. He loved it and drank several ounces. Unfortunately it made him sick but it was at least a good sign that he wanted to drink it since all he had done for days was nurse.
This picture is a bit out of order but the thing that made Lincoln the happiest was going for walks in the wagon. It was basically the only way to get him to sleep at all. It basically took two hours of walking before he would fall asleep but it was worth it. The other thing is that these wagons are extremely hard to come by. I had to walk the halls of the hospital while carrying Lincoln AND pulling his iv tree, for over an hour before finally locating an empty wagon. This photo was taken on Sunday and they even let us take Lincoln’s iv out to see how he would do without fluids for a few hours.
Jay walked Lincoln for two hours so that I could take a nap, by myself. That two hours of uninterrupted sleep was so wonderful.
Jay always drew pictures on the board when he visited.
Precious teeny man.
Here’s the form that was posted telling all of the doctors and nurses which doses to use for Lincoln in case of an emergency.
Despite the fact that the staff was very kind, I knew that we wouldn’t be sad to leave this hospital.
On Saturday night (again with the out of order!) at the hospital, I received this video from Paw Paw. This video made my month. It was such a huge blessing to see Baron (who I was missing SO terribly) having such a great time. I probably watched this video 50 or more times the first day that I received it. Nanny said that after this video was taken Baron said, “Nanny, we better cool it!” I am so thankful that Jim and Charlotte kept Baron during this crazy, chaotic and difficult time. While I was missing my little snuggle buddy like crazy I was so relieved that he was living it up and being loved on while getting precious time alone with his grandparents.
Phew. That was a lot of information in one post. I’ll end here and pick up with Lincoln being released from Dell Children’s on the next post.
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